Kibbles and Bits

-My wallet came open the other day in my purse and all my American money got mixed in with my English money. I looked at a $20 bill with disgust and said, "What is this?"


-It seems to be some kind of prerequisite to own a cute dog to live in my neighborhood.


-I haven't seen a single truck in London. Or a cowboy. Rad.


-"I don't care if all they sell at Camden Market is dead cats and old Star Trek novels, I gotta go this week to get a gift for my mom."-Unbidden thought that floated to me tonight.


-Imaginary conversations: "Oh hey girls who live in my flat and wear Lyrica stretch pants, you're gonna go for a run in the park? That's cool, I'll just lie here in bed eating candy and reading my British edition of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. You're going to your 28th play, crazy theatre boy? Alrighty then, I'll watch make-up tutorials on YouTube and bask in the satisfaction of learning how to successfully fry an egg." (Actually I've been incredibly proactive lately in that I'm half a page away from finishing my final paper and hardly anyone else has started theirs. Plus mine has gems like, "The establishment of a non-racial democracy in South Africa after decades of political and social repression represents a powerful example of the abilities of the “common people” against a corrupt or oppressive system of government, essentially a more influential and mighty force than is present in Julius Caesar" so yeah, I'm cool to lay around and eat more candy.)


-I forgot how texting works. You mean I can use my clunky little electronic clock slash camera to send messages to people, in textual format, instantly? That kind of voodoo technology must be from the devil


.-Everyone here has nightmares a lot. Does that mean the flat is haunted?


-Ok, I'm in love with David Tennant now, you happy Britain? 


-This trip is the best motivator ever to get a good job, so you don't have to share a house with 20 other people.


-Today, the flatmates and I were having an impassioned discussion about Edward Bond and "Chair" on the crowded tube and some guy interrupted to say he was enjoying the conversation even though he had no idea what we were talking about


.-For Sherlockians: the only bone I have to pick with how London is portrayed in the show is that John and Sherlock appear to shop at Tesco, but also take taxis everywhere. Taxis are expensive. John and Sherlock have money. Tesco is the trashy ghetto grocery store, we only go there to get cheap cider and junk food. John and Sherlock would never shop at Tesco. Sainsbury or Waitrose probably, Marks & Spencer even more likely (we Londonites call it Marks & Sparks, SO hip).


-All the men here wear cool, colorful socks. Why has this not caught on in America, young men.-


Priorities
Misplaced my camera (for approximately 90 seconds)
"Huhhhh.....can't find my camera, guys. Not in my bag. Or my backpack. That sucks....guess it'll turn up..."
Misplaced my Oyster card (for approximately 90 seconds)
"OH MY GOD, WHERE IS MY OYSTER CARD?!? WHERE IS IT? I CAN'T FIND IT WHERE IS IT IT IS NOT HERE IT IS NOT HERE SOMEBODY FIND IT BEFORE I LOSE MY DAMN MIND. I WILL BURN THIS CITY TO THE GROUND IF I DO NOT FIND MY OYSTER CARD."


-British toilets. 
PROS
~Public toilets are beasts. The stalls go all the way to the ground and the locks could hold out elephants. Privacy and security!
~There's like, less water in the bowl bit, so eco-friendly! (I accidentally typed "bowel" instead of "bowl" first. Best typo ever.)
CONS
~Public toilets often require payment to use. Pay to pee? Really?
~For some bizarre reason (probably in the name of hip-ness), some hip theaters around town have plywood doors on their toilet stalls. Plywood with ouchy splinters that jam up under your fingernail and fester for a week before you can dig them out. Sexy.


-I decided I don't like crumpets. They look like English muffin halves but they do not taste like English muffins. They taste like dry, spongy disappointment.